Hum Hum Hum

How is it that when a bad thing stares you straight in the face, saying, "I'm not a good idea!" it's so easy to go that direction, but when something good finally comes along, it takes a long time to grasp it, and you're hesitant to go for it? Doesn't that seem a little backwards? Hum.

Control Freak Paranoia

So, when life spirals out of your control, and you are a total control freak, how should you react? Is it an opportunity to learn to accept what you can't change? Or is it an opportunity to see how much you're willing to fight for what you want, in order to maintain that control?

Actual Reality

So here's the deal. I've been thinking a lot about two people lately. Two people I love very dearly, who I always thought were so different, and I'm finding out are actually quite similar. Okay, that's an understatement. The point is, life is trippy. Really REALLY trippy. Just when you think you've finally figured things out, life throws you a curve. Sometimes you dodge it, sometimes it hits you right in the gut and knocks you down. Sometimes you fall flat on your face trying to dodge it, and when you pick yourself up it hits you anyway.

Have you ever created an alternate reality in your head? Some place better than this one? Sort of like a dream world, I guess. But dream world has a negative connotation. I like alternate reality better.

Sometimes life just sucks, you know? And there's nothing you can do to really fix it. You can be nostalgic all you darn well please; but that never changes anything, not really. It makes me grateful though. For good friends. And good memories. And especially good memories with good friends. Sometimes that's enough to get you through, even if it's just on a day-to-day basis.

Have you ever had a school counselor who knows you by name, remembers what you want to major in, where you want to go to school, and who will respond in-depth to an email in which you ask a pertinent question?



I have one. For the first time in my life.

It's kind of a cool thing to know that the person who's supposed to give you advice that may steer the direction the rest of your life takes actually KNOWS who you are, and may actually care about the decisions you make.

Too bad there aren't more school counselors like this.

Build Schools, Not Bombs

Well, it's been awhile since I've posted something. Something relevant, at least. So, now it's a new year. I'm pretty excited to leave 2008 behind, idk about anyone else. I learned some great lessons, had some intense moments, ate lots of delicious food and now I'm having trouble doing up the button on my jeans. :)
The first real post of the new year...not much has happened in my life in the past 18 days. Okay, that's a lie, lots of things have happened, but I'm not about to update the entire month of January. I've been having major anxiety lately, over college mostly. Here's my spiel:

I want to go to Westminster. You probably already know this. I've been accepted, I just have to come up with another 10K so I can actually attend there this fall. Currently, I'm listed as wanting to major in English with a minor in Political Science. Yesterday, I decided I want to change to a dual major between English and Political Studies. I know. On top of that, I want to apply to the Honors Program, and do Honors while at Westminster. I'm hoping this will help me get to graduate school somewhere on the East Coast -- I miss New York! I'm also toying with the idea of obtaining licensure to teach Secondary Education while at Westminster. Then I can have a "marketable skill" of some sort. Eventually, I want to become certified to teach English as a second language...this may require me to become fluent in a language other than English, first. After all this lovely, I want to go to graduate school. Somewhere in there, either during undergrad or in grad school, I want to study abroad. Most especially in Prague. Ah, Prague. But anywhere in Europe would be amazing. And somehow, I want to become a political advisor. Yes, I know. How on earth does one become a political advisor. In all honesty, I don't really know.

The point of that last paragraph was mostly to prologue this next part:

So, I have this motto. Today, I finally put it into an intelligible phrase: "Build Schools, Not Bombs." My hopes in becoming a political advisor are that I can promote causes like that. Ways to impact the world for the better. I'm a HUGE advocate of education, and what having that available can do to a person, a community, a country. I'm a pacifist, and 9.9 times out of 10 I don't think that violence really solves anything; it either creates more problems or just puts a band-aid on the current situation. But education? I've been wanting to become a teacher, because I think that in a school is a place where I can do a lot of good. But now, I'm starting to think that as a political advisor I'd have more power to spread my cause, whereas teaching is concentrated. But, idk. I want to do both. Somehow. I know, I'm kinda crazy. Sigh. Anywho. There's my spiel. Build Schools, Not Bombs.

Can I just express how much I hate Katy Perry?